How to deal with a child killing father.

In all honesty, I dont know how to deal with the fact that Donkey is a murderer. The information only crossed my path recently. As you may have read, my brother Angel was killed and the death was ruled cot death. It transpired the Piggy dropped him as a result of the beating he gave mum, and Donkey had dealt a blow to Angel. Donkey disappeared after the event, blaming mum for his death. Mum was arrested and taken to harbourne police station and then released pending a phsyciatric evaluation. They didnt diagnose her then but it later transpired years after that she was in fact schizophrenic and had been undiagnosed at the time of his death. Donkey was interviewed and so was mum, then released from the police station. Angels death was then ruled a cot death due to lack of evidence. So how do you deal with the information? My first reaction was just a feeling of sheer blind rage. I wanted to kill him with my bare hands. Then after it passed I thought what would my daughter do if I was in prison? I am no good to her there. And Donkey is not someone I am willing to go to prison for. All I can say is when he dies, I hope its painful. That is how I am coping through today.